Overcoming Adversity

It seems that there are two basic types of people in the world. Those who see the glass as half full (or nearly full), and those who see it as half empty (and going down)! I have to admit that most of my life I’ve been in the first category. If life knocked me down, I jumped back up and found a new path. Risk was easy because success was always just around the corner. Nothing could stop me when I had youth, energy, health and hope. But recently, life has given me, and others of my generation, some shockingly hard tests.

The loss of a spouse to war, a disabling disease, homes destroyed or lost, the death of a parent, failure of a business or a marriage, crippling debt or chronic pain are just some of the things that can empty that glass of water completely. For so many, the hits have been multiple. Loss upon loss upon loss and still one has to get up and somehow move forward.

How do we survive such losses, such immense grief and suffering? My heart rips open a little more each day as I see the images of children in Haiti; injured, homeless and parentless. The suffering of the Haitians is beyond anything that I have experienced, yet you see amazing portraits of courage, determination and resilience amidst the horror. Where do we draw strength from when we have lost everything?

I think, this is when we dig down to our DNA, our core beliefs and reach to our Maker. It’s no surprise that many of the people pulled from the caves of crumbled concrete after many days were thanking their God and affirming their faith. Doctors have long noted the dramatic difference in the recovery of  those patients who exhibit a powerful ‘will to live’ compared to those who resign themselves to defeat and even death.

But what determines which of those people we will be? Will we be fighters, or will we submit to what seems to be our fate. I’m told that our psychology, for want of a better word, is formed over a lifetime of experiences. Yet, every infant faces a thousand defeats before it learns to stand and walk on it’s own feet. A baby has no room in it’s brain for the concept that the task might be beyond them. I know our bodies are designed to heal and I believe that there is a purpose behind every challenge that we are faced with.

To survive the seemingly random and cruel blows of fate, we have to arm ourselves with beliefs that serve us. Beliefs that help us to find or create meaning out of chaos and help us put purpose in our actions. For many, this is found in a personal relationship to God. For others, it may be a deep love of family or commitment to a set of values. In both cases, there is something greater than oneself that provides the cup to hold the water of life.

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